Wipe the slate clean... |
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Monday, September 23, 2002
Hear that? Nearly-impossible... I am too great. Saturday, September 21, 2002
Take the Polygeek Quiz at Thudfactor.com Why am I Arnie??  What Planet Are You From? this quiz was made by The Autist Formerly Known As Tim What can I say? I'm here to entertain. But thanks, Aveline! Really. Just keep that nero burning... Eh hem...  i tend to speak in riddles, and getting a straight answer out of me is indeed a notable moment. while i may act a little crazy, i am actually quite lucid and tend to be the voice of reason. my sanity is in a good balance with my insanity. target="new" title="we're all mad here">how mad are you? this quiz was made by piksy Combine this one with the first one and you have a god - Me. I mean seriously, this looks good. Don't you think? Wednesday, September 18, 2002
Hey man... saw that you've got yourself a new blog friend... ahhh... your writing is finally bein' appreciated by the masses... or startin' to be =] ~Kai~ Friday, September 13, 2002
Sorry for not doing anything for 3 days. There is such a thing called work in this world. Or rather, National Service. Add that to the fact that internet time costs money, something I am in short supply of. And also I got addicted to the 9.00pm Channel 8 show. Oh Jacelyn Tay's character (Danchun, which means innocent in Chinese) is quite like the lass I'm eyeing now. Let's call her XYZ for easy reference. In fact, it was her who alerted me to this show and this character, asking if I felt she and Danchun were similar. And I suppose I'm watching the show for her (XYZ) now. It's silly and I realise it. Stupid to watch a show just for a girl. But I'm a die-hard romantic and I'm too idealistic for my own good. All this means that this bout of love bug will reduce me to a raw slab of battered meat at the end of the day. I've done some thinking on the bus trip home and I understood why I fail at this relationship thing while other young punks will already have gone through a gross of 'sayangs'. It's simple. I'm too smart. Tis true you must know. I think too much about relationships and I place too much importance and significance on it. While the punks I've mentioned have the thinking that they can jump into any relationship because if it doesn't work out, there will be another one, I, on the other hand, am looking for something more meaningful and longer-lasting. And I respect the opposite sex too much. If the object of desire of young punk were to reject him the first time, the punk is likely to just press on, coaxing her and giving heaps upon heaps of life philosophy and reasons, trying to convince her to give him a chance. Instead, what I does is to back down at the first rejection. Agreed that it may appear as if I am a quitter, that I am a wuss who just run at the first sign of resistance. But the reason I do that is because I believe in the idea that love is a two-way street. If I laid out my cards and you tell me that there is no chance, I will leave it at that. You have made a choice and I respect that enough to not attempt to confuse and trick you into something that would probably end in misery. Let's see, I am really coming out as a loser in love here. First girl I confessed to, I left her a voice message on her pager. Got rejected. Second girl, I nervously gave her a letter (I was young and stupid...!). She never made her stand clear. We never talked again too. Third girl (and they say third time's the charm... Ho ho ho...), I confessed through sms. Didn't work out either. Also was the hardest one of the three. Fourth girl... We'll see. But I intend to do it face to face if it comes to that. And then, I would have nearly covered all forms of communication short of fax and email. I sound like a loser. I probably am. All for giving more thought and respect to something that the seemingly successful ones don't really give much sodding care about. Maybe I too should not care so much and just trick naive girls into a relationship. Nah, I could never do that simply because I would not be able to get what I want from that kind of relationship. Right, aren't I a bloody gentleman. Hah. Why do I like XYZ. For this first time I took effort to think about this. And for the first time I did not give the cliche reason, "I don't know why I like her. I just got that special kind of feeling." These are some of the reasons I found: I like her strong, unwavering character. I like her honesty. I like her innocence. I like how she does not play to other people. I like her cheerfulnees. I like her spirit. I like her smile. I like her tenacity. I like her frown. I like her flaws. I like how she still has that 'hai2 zi3 qi4". Has anyone puked their rings out yet? Guess I got a little carried away. I was smiling all the while I typed that. I have to admit this is not a side I show often. And I haven't shown this side for many months. This is the underbelly of my armadillo. Have fun poking. Tuesday, September 10, 2002
 Your magical style is Witch. What type of Magic do you work?. Take the Magical Style Quiz by Paradox Interesting... That can only mean that I am fucking up my own life. Arsehole.  You are a siren. What legend are you?. Take the Legendary Being Quiz by Paradox Great... Logical fallacy here. You are giving me two extremes when there is actually a middle ground. Now that you mentioned it, I forgot about Rudy. Rudy's Rowdy Kitchen or something like that. And hey, you should know that in the bastard business, I am more likely to turn and bite than most people out there. Though I'm one of those subtle bastards. Those that people REALLY hate. Anyway, I'll be writing up an IOU for that guy. Autumn? But I'm not old... Oh you mean the real kind of autumn... Nah, I think it's just life reminding you that you are not all powerful. Crap. But all's well so far. Been sms-ing her quite a bit. As in, last time not so close to her so don't really talk much or sms much. But these few days (actually only 1 day) have been pretty fine. If I don't succeed, at least got one more friend. Unless I confess, THEN I flop on my face. That is like, hrm............. Maybe I'm just getting bored and lonely. My family situation is stagnant now, nearer the 'Totally Fucked-up' end of the family happiness meter. So work doesn't give me pleasure, and home doesn't give me release. Somehow this still doesn't lead to 'developing-feelings-for-this-girl-I-knew-for-some-time-but-wasn't-really-close-to', but it's my own quirky logic lah. I think I've improved somewhat. Last time I would most likely avoid and avoid and hide and get paranoid and hide and avoid and etc... But hey! I'm taking the initiative to sms her! Cool... I rock! Ah-hem. Watched the Emmy-nominated (key word is 'nominated') documentary last night. Honestly, I think it's pretty pointless. It's just shows over and over and over again various videos and pictures of the event. We get like 10 (seriously that many) shots of the South Tower collapsing. It's shocking yes, and it brought back all those 'what the --!!' feelings that I had one year ago, but what's the point here? Yea I know, the documentary is supposed to show the event through the eyes of Former New York Mayor and the citizens of New York City. Somehow I felt that was overkill. One and a half hours of video and pictures. The bits I liked best were the few shots of the firemen and police and even the construction workers rolling down the streets with their vehicles, all dust-covered and weary and looking like shit, and they were greeted by miles (nearly) of people standing at the curbs, waving signs saying 'THANK YOU' or 'OUR HEROES'. That was kinda heart-warming even for me. There was this guy who was just standing there and taking a camera (not news crew though) and he was shouting to a fire engine passing him. He just kept shouting 'Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!'. He looked pretty emotional too. Neat. Another one that I liked was this shot taken after both towers collapsed. There was a couple of firemen and maybe one or two police officers and they were walking down some street (the streets all looked the same after being covered with the dust et al). I think they were walking towards Ground Zero and about to help out. And behind them, you see 10, maybe 20 other CIVILIANS, all covered in dust, some even injured. But they automatically started following the firemen and the police officers. All had the look of dead determination and the narration was mentioning about how the civilians just helped as much as they could even though they were victims themselves. Neat number two. Other than that, Rudolph (the mayor... ok the EX-mayor) didn't cry on camera, they showed a few funerals and wakes in progress (at that time lah!), and well that's about all. I know one emmy that show would never get nominated for - Cinematography. Ok ok bad joke. Well... Sigh... So that's that then. Let's hope that nothing else would happen again this year, else I think we'll have to sell our house and start living under the Shears bridge. Peachy. Welcome back manz... been missin' your updates. Maybe you can get dear 'ol Rudy (reminds me of that ol' fogey on Survivor) to sign an IOU... you never know who can turn out to be a bastard eh? Ahh... love life... yah yah, I'm interested (I'm gossip-blur but genuine cases are more than welcome). I know her? Reveal only if U wanna yo. Haha... welcome to the club... is this lovelorn thing an Autumn thang?? ~Kai~ Monday, September 09, 2002
Since the last time I took a vacation from this blog, I've also received something else from UCAS. It's a some sort of newsletter about clearing. To explain, clearing is what the folks there do to the people who could not get into the UK uni of their choice because their results were too lousy. My results were not too lousy. My money was. Too bad too bad... Maybe if I start selling the mail I get from UCAS I can get enough dough to send me over to the UK. Ho. Ho. Ho. I just kill myself with my jokes. Yesterday was about as eventful as a snail race. ALTHOUGH.... I 'sold' my MD to this guy called Rudy. He said he will call me last night to confirm the meeting place etc. He didn't call, obviously. But he did today! And he wants to get it, only if I allow him to pay me in 2 installments of $100 (doesn't take a bloody genius to realise I sold it for $200 now, does it?). My alarm went off for a while, but I agreed. Hell, I can use the money. So tomorrow I'm supposed to meet him and pass him the stuff. And tomorrow is the day I'm supposed to be on leave. Funny how life throws these things at you. But heck it, I'm gonna say that I'll be on duty and I can't make it tomorrow, so too bad Rudy. =รพ And get this (Kai, you should be soooo interested...), my heart started moving again. Kind of. As in I'm starting to have feelings for someone esle again. Yes, yes... Kinda think that this is the ONLY bloody area I haven't had any success in thus far. Sod it... But no details other than that you know her too, Kai... I don't think I'm going to take any action or do what I did last time. I think I will leave her alone. Cos she's young and innocent and I'm like... this. I honestly feel that this time round, I would be able to 'get' her though. Unusual confidence from me, but I think if I tried, I have a good chance. Either that or I am seriously delusional. I've been debating whether I should try or not, and well... I only 'think' I should leave her alone. My world was actually looking pretty dandy until this. Oh shit. Sunday, September 08, 2002
Howdy. It's been too fucking long since I came back to this thing. It's weird how it is. I leave it for months and then out of nowhere I find the fire to start writing nearly everyday. Then I leave it for another 2 months... nearly. But I'm back, at least for today. So the big Q is, "What the bloody hell have you been doing since July the 26th when you decide to go for an unannounced hiatus?!" Right. I can sum up the activites of the past month or so with these: 1) Type 2) Print what I typed 3) Fax what I printed 4) Come home and rot 5) Worry about money Technically, the above 5 activites is what I have been doing since April, since I enlisted into NS. Beautiful life really. Oh yea, about the chest pains? Not long after the last post, I succumbed and went to a doctor. He said it was muscle pain (very funny doc, like I lift weights with my nipples), gave me some meds and told me to go suffer somewhere else. Needless to say, until today, there are still some isolated cases of chest pain. But I live. I'm not worried that I'll be dead tomorrow or something sodding ridiculous like that. The stuff. Namely, the bunch of comics that was supposed to be sent out aeons ago. The good news is they finally arrived. The bad news is they arrived smelling like that they spent 2 months on a ship... Oh wait, they did. Now, the worse news is that a few days before the stuff arrived, I've written a letter to my bank to request that they get my money back. Since, the bank has sent me a letter, saying they are looking into this matter and will let me know if anything pops up. So I got the goods, and I'm trying to get my money back at the same time. Rationally speaking, I should have called the bank and told them to stop disputing these transactions (to use bank jargon). But, I saw no wrong in not doing anything and hope the bank succeeds and brings me back my $500++. Immoral as it may be, I don't give a piss about it. Problem now is, if the bank knows that I got the package, and yet I still tried to get the money from them, I might land myself in some legal troubles. Worse if they discovered I cheated them only AFTER they got my money back. Nice eh, it's about time I get some courtroom action anyhow. But I don't care. I'm letting this ride out. If I get my money and they never found out, great! If they charge me with attempted fraud, then I'll start to panic. Not very wise, what I'm doing, so don't try this kids. Oh did you know that the Prime Minister has more or less fucked himself bad during the National Day Rally Speech? The bloody idiot has got himself in a fix, branding people who migrate as "quitters" and people who don't as "stayers", and how the stayers ought to be considered saints while the quitters should be eating shit. The prat has got it made I tell you. Generally everyone has something to say about this labelling of Singaporeans. And most of them are nasty. I for one think the PM has really gotten himself in some deep shit. ERP prices increases, CPF reduces, GST increases, Paycheck reduces. And now this. As much as the PM is SUPPOSEDLY trying to get S'poreans thinking about the staying/quitting issue, I think he has just breeded a hell lot more "quitters" single-handedly in one speech then the govt did in 37 years of independence. Hahaha... Talk about the mother of back-fires. Anyway, Sep 11 is peeking around the corner, and I took leave on that day as well. Nifty. I'll be back again. And maybe I might let in on what I've been 'researching' recently. See you mates. |
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